Amber: I’m just wondering why young loves fall apart. Why is there such a thing as first love? Why isn’t it the last… or the only?
Marem: W-Well.. Yes, I have a first love. It’s called first love dahil diyan ka matututo kung paano talaga magmahal ng tama. That love will teach you so many essential things about loving and preserving yourself.
Amber: Like what?
Marem: That loving right isn’t pouring your whole self to other person. Loving right is loving a person with self preservation. Kasi hija, sa unang pag-ibig hindi mo alam paano magmahal. You will attack it wholeheartedly that you’ll forget how to love yourself. Kaya pagkatapos ng unang pag-ibig, you will come out of it a different person. Kasi masasaktan ka dahil hindi ka nagtira para sa sarili mo. The pain will change you.
Amber: So why can’t you love the same person again in the right love you are talking about?
Marem: Dahil sa unang pag-ibig, hija, they are not meant to stay. They are meant only to teach you a lesson you will only appreciate when you get older and wiser.
Amber: Do you get over your first love? How do you get over it?
Marem: There are things in life that you’ll never get over. Because if you do, you’ll forget the lesson.
“There is a time in life when you expect the world to be always full of new things. And then comes a day when you realize that is not how it will be at all. You see that life will become a thing made of holes. Absences. Losses. Things that were there and are no longer. And you realize, too, that you have to grow around and between the gaps, though you can put your hand out to where things were and feel that tense, shining dullness of the space where the memories are.”
be the main character of your life, stop comparing yourself to others!
every time you compare yourself to another person you lose your power and give it to others.
be aware of your own value
the value you give to others, give to yourself multiplied!
if there is something you don’t like about yourself try to change it from compassion and self-love, don’t judge yourself for it, we all have the ability to change
recognize that comparing yourself with other people is something negative and prevents you from growing and evolving
you are the main character of your life, no one else, that’s why it doesn’t matter if you “believe” that someone else is more handsome or smarter than you, it’s not, it’s you, because it’s your life, think about this every time you compare yourself
recognize when these thoughts come to your mind and focus in turn on something positive, something good about your day or something you like about yourself
don’t compare chapter 20 of a person with chapter 3 of your life
focus on learning and not comparing yourself
turn comparison into admiration
be aware of the damage you are doing to yourself when you do this
write down everything you like about yourself and everything you would like to have or be
practice self-love every day, treat yourself with love
focus on you and your growth not on what others do
focus on what you like about yourself and not on what you don’t-
recognize that you are the main character of your life, the life you are living right now is only lived by you so it doesn’t matter how other people are or how they live their life, it doesn’t hurt you, focus on you and your growth, you are unique and valuable you don’t have to be like anyone else
some ways to practice self-love ( i will write another post on this)
forgive yourself
take care of your physical and mental health
avoid toxic people
connect to your feminine energy and make rest a priority when you need it
